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October 12, 2011   Posted by: Khaled

How To Use Push-Pull Psychology To Attract Women

The purpose of a tease is to reduce the intensity of your interest in her. Pushing forward a little and then pulling back is a great way to tease a woman.

After you state your interest in her, you tease her to make her wonder if you’re serious or not. That will keep her pondering. Example: “You are amazing. Too bad it won’t work out between us.”

You can say that after she says something that really inspires you. Or “You seem very intelligent, though your first impression was kinda iffy.”

Be careful not to overdo it. Your goal is to make a solid connection with her, so know when to shift gears and get real, after you’ve demonstrated that you’re the prize. You need to be seen as a real person in her mind rather than some goofball dancing around.

Usually it’s best when she indicates to you that she really likes you, then you can state that you like her, instead of the other way around. Most guys logically think that by telling a woman how they really feel about her, then she will reciprocate her feelings in return. Unfortunately it doesn’t work this way.

Being a leader means going for what you want without making any excuses for it. Being vulnerable without depending on a desired outcome.

Your role is to lead her in the direction you want. If she chooses not to follow it’s her loss, so move on without bitterness. For example, you can say something like “Now I realized you have a really good personality. That is rare. I’m glad we’re conversing.” It’s very important to show your interest in her after qualifying her and demonstrating your status.

Keep in mind that what most women what they say they want is usually not what they respond to. Most women say they prefer tall, dark, handsome men with over-sized packages yet you see them rolling with average looking men bald, hairy, and with over-sized belly.

Look at commercials and advertisements of men, who don’t look like you and me. Women are told by society and the media that they should respond to a certain type of men with specific physical attributes that we covered earlier and a particular personality. A personality of being nice and sweet, overly caring, and available. However, these same men that you see attractive women rolling with most of them are not nice, sweet and caring and most of them are not available. On the contrary, they treat them harshly, they are sometimes mean, and come across as jerks.

If you don’t believe me, look for yourself. Anytime you see an attractive woman with an average looking guy, approach them and ask them how did they meet. Though each response may be different yet the context mostly the same. His life goes on if she leaves.

See, attraction is not based on a criteria that a man falls into, and women do not choose which man to be attracted to. It just happens unconsciously after certain emotions are triggered.

The good news is that these attraction triggers are learned. ANYONE can learn them and be able to use them successfully to get an attractive woman to respond to them.

 Attraction is an emotion that most women want to chase in a man. Their desire to look for a man creates tension in her that she strives to release.  

That’s why you see many really attractive women with below-average looking guys. These guys aren’t necessary chasing her, seeking her approval, and being super nice and sweet to her.

On the contrary, you’ll see that many of these guys are just plain selfish who are only concerned with putting a smile on their own face. Yet women chase them because they are not trying to get anything out of them. Women only see that part of them is not seeking her approval, so they disregard their selfish element.

Fortunately, you don’t have to be the selfish jerk to get an attractive woman interested in you. You can learn how to adapt certain positive qualities they have and disregard those qualities that do not serve you.

Regardless of your looks, power, or bank account, you can learn how to create attraction to the point where nothing else matters. Sparking unsettled emotional anxiety then releasing it and starting it again will get her to feel like she is on an emotional roller-coaster ride.

That will entice most women and wanting more of these feelings.

Examples Of Push-Pull

An example of push/pull is something like this: “You know, you’re the best dressed woman tonight.” After she thanks you, you can take it back: “Actually, you’re the third best dressed woman tonight so I’m going to call you number three.”

Since most girls like to be number one, she will complain and say that she wants to be number one. Then you can promote her to number two, just because she is being competitive. That’s not a way to be manipulative, rather it’s to be challenging and fun.

Healthy women will like and appreciate being challenged, its fun! The key is to keep it light and playful: hot and cold.

Keep flirting with a woman until she gives you signs of interest, then pull back by teasing her. Keep the balance: not too nice and not too aloof. In the beginning, be willing to make mistakes and screw things up. Then calibrate and you will become really good at this playful stuff.

A good structure for a push-pull is to give her a genuine compliment (not based on her looks), then tease her on something unrelated. Example: “You are so amazing. Do you know how to cook?” If she says no, you can say “I don’t know if our relationship is going to work out anymore”

If she says yes, you can say “Awesome, let’s get married immediately. But then you have to go to work to support me, otherwise I’ll divorce you and take half your money.” smile.

Another attitude you can implement in push-pull is the attitude of big brother/bratty sister. That will disqualify you as a sexual suitor and create a challenge in her to get you to confirm her sexual power.

For example, you can say something like “You know, you really remind me of my bratty little sister. It’s kind of cute though. She always gets what she wants, except with me. I always win.”

I hope that serves you. Always remember to keep it light and do not take yourself or her too seriously.

Underneath it all it has to be the desire to want to genuinely want to connect with a woman, so this is just for a short period of time till you create attraction, then you shift forward towards creating deep meaningful connection.

If you want to learn more get the book that reveals it all Social Seduction

Your friend,


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About the author

Khaled - Khaled is a seminar leader and trainer, professional key note speaker, and a lifestyle Coach. He is the author of the book “The Gents Code – Building confidence through women and dating”. He also leads seminars in leadership and communication for business professionals all throughout the United States and in the Middle East. Khaled grew up in Beirut, Lebanon and immigrated to the United States in 2001 to pursue his dream. With dedication and sacrifice, Khaled became a US citizen, completed his Bachelor's Degree in Engineering from Arizona State University, and then became a successful business owner of two luxury car dealerships in Scottsdale, Arizona. Although it seemed like he was living the “American Dream”, Khaled struggled internally with a feeling that he was not serving his true purpose. He realized the “mediocrity mentality” that society pushes on men in America. This realization left him constrained spiritually, socially and mentally. Consequently, this left him feeling confused in his role as a man in western society and constrained in being able to relate to women. To end the suffering, he switched gears and began focusing on personal development. He worked hard to train himself to become a bold leader, a practice he is dedicated to today. He is committed to empowering people to transform their lives in a way that touches, moves and inspires them. Khaled became a Life Coach after seven years of relentless learning and development in areas of human psychology, spirituality, and personal transformation. Khaled’s evolution is attributable to dauntless focus and to a variety of accredited sources of transformative learning technologies, including Landmark Education, Anthony Robbins, Neuro-Linguistic Programming, trauma release exercises, spiritual exploration, and more. He is committed to the practice of transforming people’s minds to free men from internal bondage such that they may live a life they love and live it with a purpose. Khaled’s custom developed coaching programs are designed to empower people to achieve outcomes they want by providing methods for discovering true purpose and authentic confidence. He coaches men in the area of women, including interacting and dating quality women. His coaching practice includes guided seminars and boot camps, field work, and 1 on 1 coaching, where he is able to teach the psychology of attraction and strategies for building self-confidence. Since 2013, Khaled has been traveling all over the United States leading seminars in leadership development for business professionals and leading seminars for men on building self-confidence with women and to improve all other relationships. His current personal goals are to continue the process of becoming completely self-actualized, and to serve as a guide on this journey for others. Through his own personal transformation, Khaled knows what it’s like to undertake this journey alone and he wishes to make the process a healthier, quicker, and smoother one for others. He now recognizes that if he hadn’t originally struggled to find his core identity with women, he would never have begun his journey of self-development en route to becoming a professional key note speaker and a seminar leader for business professionals. Though he may not have realized it at the time, his blind pursuit of women was like a carrot on a stick that, after enduring enough pain, motivated him to focus on his own growth. This is why he believes that helping other men with women leads to even greater results: being self-actualized, overcoming limiting beliefs and insecurities, and achieving success in all areas of life. Since 2009, Khaled has been coaching men in different venues day and night, teaching them the art of attracting women. In Khaled’s words, “my biggest joy is when I receive engagement and wedding invitations from my clients.” When a man lives his life in uncertainly, then the man is constantly seeking approval from others. As a natural consequence, the thought of meaningfully trusting this man is discomforting to most. No one can really be sure what he really thinks, what he will really do, and who he really is; when all he ever offers is not based on him, but instead on what he thinks someone else wants him to be. Women want to feel secure. It’s their natural instinct, just as protecting women is ours. If all women see is a man who settles, or a man who gives up their pride and won’t defend their dignity, then the woman will sense on an instinctive level that she will not feel completely secure with him. They will never trust this man because they will sense that he is unable to trust himself. It’s easy to learn quick tricks and cheap techniques for attracting women. This journey is not about that. It is much deeper than that. It is a journey of a personal transformation so that you create the life style you want and become the man you always wanted to be. Join The Movement!

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  2. A I
    Jan 22, 2014

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    Aug 04, 2014

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    Jan 03, 2015

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  6. Ezeokoye Theophinio
    Apr 23, 2015

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  7. sirblueice
    Dec 28, 2015

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  8. Yagi
    Aug 25, 2016

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